Things Become Extinct

The tree is down, and 107.9 has finally stopped spinning holiday songs. I managed to slip through another holiday relatively unscathed. Real life with all its cracks and blemishes has returned.

I got a couple gift certificates to Best Buy, and procured a copy of the third season of Northern Exposure. I popped it in yesterday and settled into the couch with a fresh iced tea, to let Chris and Joel solve all my ills, just like they used to. Right on cue the phone starts vibrating on the glass table. The Wormster was on his way home with a new idiot box, and needed a turbo caffeinated install from the W.B.. After all these years, I was not going to let the big man down, on the one occasion I could offer him a hand. I topped off the tannic acid bomb, added some saccharin, squeezed the citrus, and off to the races went I.

I forgot how much I loved unboxing gear and setting it up. Damn, that T.V. made me scratch my head. I have never been tempted to dump my old WEGA C.R.T. but, I was having adulterous thoughts after seeing Worm's new rig. He starts talking about how it's been five years since he worked at the shop. I haven't been a home theatre tweak for eleven. Time flies when you are trying to get a life.

Today Lil' W.B. and I headed out to get some trail time on his new ride and we ran into a new guy. He is checking out the clearly marked maps, and I inform him that he could get confused way faster by coming with us. I begin showing him the ropes out at Tom Brown and Cadillac. I channel Cliff Clavin as I tell him way more fun facts than he wants or needs, using grand gestures, and waving my hands all over hell and half of Georgia.

"We're losing all this..... this is going to be re-routed.....this used to be a plantation.....this all used to be an outlaw trail....It's a little known fact that the ancient Polynesians where the first to wheelie drop this section.."

I am sure the guy was ready to throw himself off a building, but I never let my audiences lack of enthusiasm deter me. On the way back home (after the requisite slushy, a W.B./Lil' W.B.. post ride tradition) I couldn't help but think everything is changing, and some of it ain't coming back.

My fork has been sagging (like the rest of me). I needed to get on line and do some research. How could that fork be three years old? I just bought it! The pages are ripping off my calender a little too quick.

After a nice dinner, I plopped down on the couch. The kids were killing Nazis on the X-Box, Mama was deep into some sad and tragic Lifetime Network movie, and the home theatre wasn't occupado. N.E. season three, was spinning in the carousel before you could whistle the moose theme.

"UH.....Why is the picture so grainy? Wheres the original music?"

I am slipping into the tar pit, and the fossil record, as we speak. Don't mind me as I thrash around. It will be over soon enough.

W.B.Z.N.