Thursday, November 13, 2008

Bark At The Moon!

Nietzsche once said: "If you stare into the abyss long enough it will stare back at you."
I can tell you now that I have tried it, I saw nothing staring back, but I do have sore hands, a sore knee (with a small cut) and I can't stop laughing. Conventional wisdom would dictate that if you are wearing a four hundred dollar light on your head, and you are also riding in the dark, it might be wise to turn on said light. Well conventional wisdom has never been an element of any ride I have been on with the crew.

It was almost a full Beaver Moon last night (thanks Rev) and someone made a joke, regarding the validity of the manhood, of the poor unfortunate BASTARD! that turned his light on first. This led to a full a lap of Over Street and Red Bug in the inky depths of darkness. What's that? Not enough of a challenge you say? Oh, let's also ride without brakes! Because I wasn't hitting enough unseen obstacles before! We averaged about three miles an hour, and screams of horror were belted out about every two seconds. All I know is my arms feel like I lifted a 67 V.W. Bug.

The highlight of the evening was when Frog Legs yelled out, in absolute terror: "STUFF!" because he was out front, warning us of danger, and had no idea what he was rolling over. My eyes are still dilated.

Ideas for future rides;

1. Live Oak on flat tires.

2. Munson on road bikes.

3. City ride on stiff single speeds.

4. Tom Brown with out saddles.

5. Bike Church with out weed......well okay that last one ain't gonna happen.



BIGWORM said...

I've already done #4.

Ms. Moon said...

And now I see how you got your name.

BIG JIM said...

Yea, some of that "stuff" jumped up and got me last night. I've got scrates all over my arms and legs. Good times.

juancho said...

That's good training for when you all have to finish San Felasco in the dark.

reverend dick said...

Sounds like y'all are doing it right down there at the bottom of the country...

nicol said...

Now, riding without the saddle, anywhere...that's just not a pleasant thought.

bikechain said...

I've done # 2 on this list.

Human Wrecking Ball said...

Worm thanks for taking the bait.
Sis, if the shoe must be fabulous!
You were funny last night. Your suffering brings me joy.
Juancho, I'll see you in BASTARD! HELL!
Rev, thanks for the moon beaver.
Nic, your illness just isn't as advanced as ours.
B.C....really? thats f-ed

AucillaSinks said...

I once led Mingo and Six Pack Pat on a full moon trail ride across the Teton Range. We started on the Idaho side in the afternoon. Took a nap at sunset and then rode up the Devils Stairs and along Death Canyon Shelf in the full luna light. The moon sunk over the ridge during our descent and the forested trail segments in Death Canyon were very dark. We exited onto the floor of Jackson Hole just after sun up. In those days, we used dilated pupils to ride in the woods at night, not sissy lighting systems.

mark.alexander said...

Wrecking Ball. My group has a new member. Got a bike 2 months ago, and he's doing 30 miles rides with us already. Former South African rugby player. He needs a berth for San Felasco. We've got 6 going already. If you hear of an opening, please let me know.